Selective
by Ventiwings
Summary: I always see that look in her eyes, it made me feel like I belonged here, but how come my chest hurts every time she smiles at someone else?
1. Chapter 1

Selective  
Summary: I always see that look in her eyes, it made me feel like I belonged here, but how come my chest hurts every time she smiles at someone else?

* * *

When I was younger, I found it hard to interact with people. I would always stay in some corner of the room or go outside and take a long walk. Taking long walks helped me think things through, and it'd usually take an hour or so for me to cool off. After about seven times I took my usual walk, my parents stopped caring because they knew that they couldn't get through to me. So when it was time for my daily walk, I got into an accident.

When I didn't return home after the hour, my parents started to worry. They called the police to look for me, but were informed that I got into an accident. There was this guy who was completely drunk and he began picking a fight with me. After many times of trying to avoid the altercation, the guy took me by surprise and shoved me into the street. I tried to grasp my balance, but before I knew it a bus came my way and well…

_Everything turned black._

_I can't even tell you if it was painful or not because everything just fell apart for me._

Soon after, I was hospitalized and I sat on my bed without a single thought in my head. The doctor said that my body was trying to protect me by making me forget about the accident. However, I just didn't care; maybe this was what I've been wishing for with every birthday wish I've been given.

Every year, I'd always stare longingly at the flames since they had a purpose and had always been able to complete that purpose. They were lit carefully on the thing, wax candles and I blew them away with a single wish in my head:

_"A drastic change in my life."_

I was always that shy kid in class, never wanting to be in someone's way and always kept to myself. I was the one who always got pushed around, always being treated as someone's gopher, and was the scapegoat of everyone's problem. I was never really liked at my school or in my neighborhood in general because of the way I looked and acted.

My parents would always make sure to welcome me back as warmly as possible and pampered me to no end. I love my parents, I really do, but it's not like they'll always be by my side to give me comfort when I get older. It was also because they would work late at night and they try so hard to wake up each morning to greet me and let me off to school.

My mom used to try and make me lunch every day, but now that she has to do overtime, I was barely getting the usual plethora of food. My dad would give me lunch money for it, but since he got promoted he's been called away on duty so we don't even have our usual father-son weekends anymore. For the past two years, they were barely home at all and so they had to hire a sitter in order to watch me. The sitter never liked me and would tell me to stay in my room or go out of the house so she didn't have to deal with me. It was fine, I never liked her either.

So after the accident, my parents decided to change their routine and unofficially told me that we were moving. In truth, I was ecstatic with the idea, but I didn't show it. My mom talked to me nonstop during my first day in the hospital, deciding that staying with her baby was more important than working. My dad kept in touch by calling me on the phone during his work and tried to stall as long as possible before his meetings. When my parents couldn't come, they'd send flowers as apologies and write really gushy cards that'd make me laugh most of the time.

_The other times…_

_The others time, well, the cards made me cry myself to sleep._

Unlike them, the ones who had nothing at first but became successful through hard and perseverance, I was never strong. They were tough, never letting get them down and there were many times they told me that it was me who kept them going. I felt happy, brimming with joy when they told me that, but I couldn't even bring myself to become like them. To become the type of person who would have that natural courage coursing through their veins. It felt like I was a burden to them because I couldn't hold down a part time job before the accident.

It wasn't because I wasn't capable; it was more like because I was treated as trash and was harassed by some of my co-workers; just like in school I was the scapegoat.

My parents told me not to worry about money since they can provide more than enough for me, but I found it unfair. I wanted to work harder in order to show them my gratitude, but I didn't think they understood my actions. They never did.

"Aren't you excited?" Mom asked while unpacking the last of our stuff in our vacant house. It was spacious, nice and had stories instead of our old house. "This is a much nicer house than our last one, and this time we live in an environmentally friendly neighborhood." She continued while taking out the clothes and began to refold them on the wooden floor boards.

Mom knew about the issues I had in our old neighborhood, and even though I could sense that she was resentful of how I've been treated, she wasn't able to do a thing. No one would believe that I was the victim and I had only myself to blame for being targeted.

"The kitchen is splendidly made as well! I could make your lunches so easily now!" She boasted with a hearty tone and I couldn't help but faintly smile at that. That was so like her. She always found something to say and compliment that would relate to nurturing me.

"I…I'm going to check my room…" I informed weakly, unable to grasp the same happiness she was radiating. She turned around and flashed me a smile, as if sending me some sort of cheer behind her action. I tried to return one of more successful smiles back to her, but it was hopeless.

"Don't overexert yourself," Mom beamed at me softly before resuming her unpacking and refolding. I stood there for a moment and nodded, there weren't any words I could tie together to form a sentence. So I began to take one small step back then suddenly broke into a run up the wooden stair case.

_Stupid mom…_

_It's you who should overexert yourself!_

I ran through the halls and found that there were four bedrooms with a bathroom just at the end of the hall. The biggest room was of course going to belong to my parents so which of the three rooms left should I choose? I inspected all of them and two out of the three rooms were the same size, the one that was rivaling in size with my parent's room was the one that was further away. I guess that room is for the eldest child?

While I was walking towards it, my dad just stepped out of the bathroom and stretched out his arms. "Ah! Are you ready to choose your room?" He asked with that goofy grin of his. I nodded and he told me to take him to the one I chose. When I did, he said that there was going to be a lot of work needed to be done.

I told him not to trouble himself, but him being the loveable, big guy he was said it wasn't a problem and told me to relax. I had school in a few days there I wasn't allowed to help in recreating a living area for all three of us. Again, I was in the zone of their pampering and I had nothing to give back to them.

For some reason, it felt like everything disappeared around me and I was left in a sea of darkness with a single spot light hitting me from above. This was my comfort zone. The place I wanted to leave, but somehow, feared moving from it. I guess my feet planted themselves into the soil of my comfort zone and they didn't want to be blown by the harsh reality outside of it.

The spotlight never moved from me and it was the only source of light here. My only companion who understood everything was my shadow and even it pitied my superstition of embarking on a mission to jump from this sole spotlight to a world of light. Was I that pitiful? Am I so pitiful that I view myself as a pathetic being?

"I-I'm going to take a walk!" I yelled and began to sprint down the stairs, not caring for anything at the moment. The spotlight was still shining down at me and I wanted to make it leave. I wanted it to vanish from me forever! When I jumped down from the last steps, I feverishly slipped on my shows, grabbed the jacket I dropped on the floor and slapped my hand on the door knob. I needed to go on a walk. I needed my hour.

"H-Hey! You can't go on your walk! You'll get lost!" I heard my mom and dad cry out as they tried to run for me, but it was too late, I smacked open the door and sped anywhere my feet could take me. Going on all of those walks, helped give me the stamina and strength my parents lacked. It was another thing that made me different from them. I didn't want to be different from them!

I always felt like I was some sort of alien at family-get-togethers because of how differently I act and react when I mingle with my family members. My relatives try not to show it, but I know that they don't enjoy being in my presence and try to sugar coat it by giving me compliments of my academics and athletics. If it weren't for school, they'd probably look down on me because I had no social life.

They…

My relatives never loved me as a regular human being.

They saved face by being completely nice to me and I even overheard them bad mouthing me while my parents were elsewhere talking up a storm.

I wished every night that I could be like my parents.

That was before the bus incident and I wished that incident would've taken my life.

I stopped and found myself hunching over and breathing in and out cold breaths of air. It was freezing out here! I looked around and I found myself already into a bustling part of the town. Everyone was wearing overstuffed winter coats or sweaters and other wear that would be logical to wear during this cold season. Logical, huh? I was anything but that.

I let my emotions get the best of me again and my mind demanded that I take a walk to cool off so I don't take it out on my parents. Even though my mind was in a tangle webbed mess, my body was quickly losing its heat. I hugged myself since this jacket didn't have the material for the winter cold. It's the jacket I wore under my usual winter coat and I feel like such an idiot for not thinking things through.

_Stupid._

_I'm so stupid._

It was already dark before I knew it and I felt hot tears sliding down my face. I'm such a piece of trash; my parents don't deserve someone like me! I'm just a spoiled brat who can't do a thing to help his own parents where as they've down everything in their power to make me happy. I don't even know why they care so much. I'm just a worthless pile of flesh!

The spotlight was still shining on me and it felt so cold. The winter air was swiveling around me like some sort of invisible blanket. The air whirled around me again and I shivered harshly even though the hot tears felt like there were going to freeze my face.

"Haku! I told you to not walk out without proper clothing!"

A hand grabbed my shoulder and forced me to turn around, I was still a heap of tears and I can tell that my face was probably distorted into some sort of nervous wreck. But who was this kid? She called me Haku and had the face of mother beginning her scolding hour. Then when she realized it was me, her expression changed from a surprised one to a regretful one then to a sincere one…all of those expressions from just second of looking at me.

_It was a strange feeling._

"Oh goodness! I'm so sorry!" The girl cried out and she began waving her hands frantically in the shivering air. I quickly tried to wipe away my endless tears with my sleeves, but it was to no avail. I just couldn't stop crying.

The girl probably figured this out, or was impulsive by nature, so she grabbed my arms and calmed down my frantic body language. Her big, innocent looking eyes stared daggers into mine with her lips pursed so tightly, it was as though she ironed them on there. Then she shoveled her hand into her pocket and sheepishly gave me a laugh. When she took out her hand, it was gloved with a teal colored fabric and then she grabbed her blue scarf and used it to wipe away my tears. For some reason, it worked instead of the sleeves of my jacket that I used.

"It's not good… to cry in a strange place," She informed giving me a kind smile that made my heart skip three beats. She reminded me of my mom when I looked through the family albums when I was younger. Mom was so beautiful with her long white hair and graceful smile. Even though she looked pale and fragile, I considered her one of the strongest people alive. "A-Are you okay? You're crying again!" Even though I heard her, I couldn't help, but feel the tears returning into my eyes and flowing down my face.

"W-What?" I stammered while touching my face, only to have my hand swatted from it. She resumed drying them away with her scarf and I could see the places where it got stained.

"I'm sorry for mistaking you for someone else, but it was the color of your hair that gave it away, though…" The girl began to trail with her face gaining a light shade of pink. "I guess I should've known it wasn't my friend since you didn't have long hair." I was baffled; wouldn't it be obvious that I don't long hair? Was she blind or something? "I forgot to bring my glasses with me, I'm sorry!" She cried out while slapping her hands together and bowing in apology.

I took a step back, taken aback from the reaction and apology. There was so much raw emotion from that simple action and it unparalleled my parents' endless adoration for me. When she pulled her head up, she tilted it and shot me a simple beam of confusion. Then she resumed her previous posture and walked over to me once more with her hand slowly going in the air.

"Is something bothering you?" The girl asked and I took another step back when she got closer. She furrowed her eye brows and puffed her cheeks before quickening her pace towards me. Then she jabbed her index finger at my chest and lifted her face up to mine. She was shorter than me, so I guess she had to look up to talk to me with such fierce eyes. "It's not good to bottle things up, y'know." Her innocent demeanor suddenly changed and it terrified me.

"I-I…" I began to stutter then I turned my head and wanted the fluster on my face to disappear. This was one of those rare moments that I put my guard down and let someone approach my comfort zone. She was under the spotlight with me and everything else began to vanish and fade into darkness. "I don't need to tell a stranger my problems!" I managed to yell out and I took a peek at looking down at her.

I expected her to slap me or at least give me some sort of pissed off emotion, but she didn't. She just tilted her head and beamed me a smile that made my heart skip yet another three beats. It felt like I was going to have a heart attack because of this girl.

"So you won't talk to a stranger, eh?" She paused and flashed me a charming smile that made my face heat up despite the frost air. "My name's Hatsune Miku, I'm a third year in high school and currently holding down a part time job at a café as a performer." Her smile seemed to be plastered on her lips, and her eyes glimmered like the stars in the sky. I noticed that she put in a raw emotion when she said the word 'performer' and must want to fulfill her dream to become a famous one.

"I-I…"

"Hey now! I'm not a stranger anymore, so now you can tell your problems to me!" Miku persisted with a shine in her teal eyes as she bawled her hands into fists and gave me a determined look. Was she the type who likes to get involved in everyone's problems and try to be the one who solves everyone? She must be the overachiever type. The one who always tries to give it over one hundred percent and would plan how to get on top of things when beaten down; such an easy analysis from this kind of girl.

She's not ever putting her guard up to a stranger like me.

When I looked into her eyes again, it felt like she was out of my comfort zone and in an entirely new spotlight. The light looked so dazzling around her with her charming smile bringing an angelic atmosphere around her. My body just began to react and I lifted my right arm, trying to reach for her, only to have it grabbed by hers and having the sensation of heat wrapped around it. I didn't realize it, but apparently my hands were frozen and lacked the pair of gloves I probably threw on the floor near the box of clothes.

The tears came back and the Miku girl with her twin aqua colored pony tails grew alarmed due to my abrupt sobbing. She was spouting out some sort of web of comforting words with a worrying tone, but I barely heard a word from her because I felt so happy. I didn't know why, but I just was. The tears felt great as they slid down my cheeks and then down to the concrete ground and when I my head was lowered with a smile on my face, I found small particles of fluff falling too.

_Snow._

I raised my head up to find a mystified look on Miku's when she saw the snow beginning to fall and then turned to face me.

"Despite the problems you have… I'll be the first to say Merry Christmas." She flashed me that attractive smile and her misty looking eyes as the snowflakes fell upon her. I didn't know what came over me, but I reached out to her and hugged her. I didn't want her spotlight to be so far away from mine. Hers was so much warmer, more inviting and it was so brilliantly bright compared to my dull, cold one. It was as though her light was the silver lining in my cloudy life and I couldn't help but grasp it so that I could have a taste in the experience.

She didn't bother to fight back; instead she just stood there, completely still. When was I going to let go? If I were given the choice to let go, then I would choose never, I felt so secure.

"What's your name, Stranger-san?" Miku whispered and I felt her warm breath tickle my ear. I felt my face heat up by the temperature.

"…U-Utatane… Piko."

"Merry Christmas, Piko-kun."

* * *

Ah I promised to put up a Miku x Len fic, but when I discovered Piko, I was like "He's...so...cute!" I'm such a sucker for frail looking characters w No joke, that's why I liked Len (though people made him tsundere, so I liked him even more) Anyway, I was gonna make Piko all distant and stuff in this chapter, but then the idea just faded away, so I'll probably do that next chapter.

I hope you all have a Merry Christmas!

~Ventus


	2. Chapter 2

Selective  
Summary: I always see that look in her eyes, it made me feel like I belonged here, but how come my chest hurts every time she smiles at someone else?

* * *

There was a blush on my face, one that I couldn't help but sustain as people began to fill in the room. It was because of the intoxicating scent of alcohol blended with delicious food. Even though the invitees were gathering in animal-like packs in different areas, it felt like their main source of life was in the living room. I was stuck to the couch, cushioned between my great aunt who wore her flamboyant red, faux coat and my gluttonous uncle with a turkey leg in his hand. My little cousins were crawling all over the place with race cars in their hands and zoomed around the grown-ups legs.

The cousins around my age were lounging around upstairs in the hall ways so they wouldn't be forced to mingle with the adults. Then the cousins who were married were in perfect sync with our aunts and uncles with cups of wine in their hands or plates splattered with food. My dad was playing an intense card game with a few of his brothers while my mom was gossiping with the female cast of our family. It feels like it was inhumanly impossible to get along with these people, but when I see my parents happy, that was enough for me.

"Oh Piko-chan, you're still so thin!" My grams yelled at me while pinching my cheeks with her sharp nails. She still had her youthful vigor and barely looked older than the age of fifty; though, I shouldn't be surprised, the appearance of my family makes it seem like we live in the fountain of youth. Her gray hair didn't olden her appearance, it made her look like some sort of snow angel with the puffy white coat she wore on her bony shoulders. "And yet you're so athletic!"

She kept on tossing me compliments that made me try my hardest not to scream for help so that my mom or dad would whisk her away. I shouldn't bother them. They look so happy anyway.

"Oh if only our little Pico was as slender and athletic as you, Piko-chan!" Grams informed with a wishy-washy tone and released my cheeks from her pincers.

"Ma! No need to make my boy look down at me!" Dad shouted from the den area where the card games were being played. I heard his brothers create a chorus of laughter before they talked about how dad was always the shrimp in the family and was never able to throw a ball properly. My dad wasn't the one who taught me how to play sports correctly; I was the one who taught him instead with my mom's help of course.

"Oh hush Pico!"

"Maaaaa!"

Then she walked into the den and I could hear a playful smack coming from the den area making everyone laugh at dad's mishap. I soothed my cheeks and dived out from the closed space between my great aunt and uncle. It was so suffocating being next to a woman who sprays excessive perfume and a man who had hands greased up way to thoroughly by the food. Also, the music was way too loud for my taste when it played these tracks of techno and nonstop pop music that made some of them begin to dance in a very…embarrassing fashion.

I took in a deep breath and released it; it would probably be a good time for one of those "hour walks" I like so much. When I thought about it, it's been about a week since my last one and all I've been doing was blankly look outside my room window while sitting on my old bed in my new room. One single topic with what seemed like a million related topics would hover in the center of my brain, engraving its existence in it. And that single topic would be the discovery of Hatsune Miku.

Just her name made me flash with utter embarrassment.

"Are you drunk or are you having one of _those _moments?"

"W-What?" I found myself stuttering and found Miki, well SF A2 Miki to be more accurate. How she got the whole "SF-A2" added to her name was beyond me, but her parents weren't really bothered by it when she started calling herself that. Wait, why'd she say I was drunk? And what does she mean by _those _moments? What did that mean? "W-Were you talking t-to me?"

One of the other traits that made me different from my parents was that I had the habit to stutter. To them they found it adorable and would try to help me break the habit. To everyone else, it was annoying and made sure that I wouldn't have to read aloud any long paragraphs or sentences or they'd make me get straight to the point when explaining how to solve an equation. My voice wasn't all to masculine either, so I was often teased and harassed by it that I become so soft spoken that my voice become like a whisper in the breeze. It was yet another pathetic thing about my entire being as a whole.

"You look like you're drunk with that goofy look on your face. Did Dell-nii trick you into drinking something from the bar area?" Miki interrogated while placing her hands on her hips after swatting away a bundle of her red hair. Her reddish eyes were fierce and they reminded me of how Hatsune-san stared at me during Christmas Eve. My heart did that usual skip down the block and I felt as if I was in heavenly bliss by just remembering her angelic charm.

Miki huffed and crossed her arms.

"You're so weird, Piko-kohai."

"K-K-Kohai? M-Miki, I'm you're a-age!"

It was true, even though she was born months earlier, it didn't mean that I was an underclassman compared to her. Besides, her grades were poorer than mine since all she does is sing and dance all day long, _even _when guests are over too. And she always wore these ridiculous dresses and insisted that she was going to make it big in the fashion industry and be the top model in her future clothing line. At first, I admired her ambitious nature, but lately, it seemed as though she was going over the top with her designs since it seemed like it was made for robots.

"You barely act like you're my age, so therefore, you're my kohai and I'm your senpai!"

She was also acted like the boss of me when we were little, so maybe that's what triggered my sheep like nature. She would smack me whenever I didn't do anything correct or when I tried to argue back and would drag me to places I didn't want to go because she didn't want to suffer alone. It was as if I was her minion from the very beginning and I didn't like that kind of thought process between us cousins.

"Stop acting like you're an adult, it's giving me a headache."

Dell walked into our little conversation as I bit on my lower lip to stop it from quivering. I was glad that Dell came in to straighten Miki out because I was already on the verge of tears when the conversation started. It was like she found a way to break me into a crying mess even today and must've enjoyed her little skill immensely. She should just stick with designing in her little studio that should've been the study room for her mom. I found her pretty unfair most of the time, and it's not biased either, she would always take charge with whatever was planned for the kids.

"It's not like you're such a good example of acting like an adult with your smoking your lungs to death!" Miki argued back with a passionate voice that it made the people around us stop and stare then go back to their own conversations. That's what I hated the most when talking to Miki and Dell. They always stir up trouble whenever they start talking about the whole maturity levels for children and adults. Miki would start throwing insults and badmouth his smoking habit while Dell would take all of it without complaint and slap her across the face when she finally got to the point of pissing him off.

_These two truly frightened me._

Also, Dell had a tendency to start spewing a river of curses at Miki and then she'd start throwing the punches to force him to take back everything he said about her. Even though Miki is a usually cheerful, but bossy girl, she was considered nonviolent because she didn't want to damage her so-called perfection. Dell, on the other hand, didn't care about the gender or age of a person, as long as they were able, he'd beat the crap out of them. It didn't matter if they were close family or complete strangers; he'd deal with them either way.

Their violent tendencies would usually rouse a stormy relationship with one another and it was as though they should be kept at different parts of the world. I'm not exaggerating either.

So with them being distracted by one another, I began climbing up the stairs and passed by all of my other cousins who were laughing and chatting with one another. There were some who were leaning against the wall or rails with a cup of soda in their hands trying to look the part of being with the in crowd. When they saw me, they just gave me sneering glares, sending me signals that I shouldn't join them. It's not like I wanted to anyway, I was never allowed to join in their conversations when we were little to begin with. To them I was some kind of freak show that should never taint their glamorous life style.

I lowered my head and trudged past them while safely making it to my room and shutting the door behind me. Even with the music and adults' voices below so loud, I heard the teenage pack bursting out in laughter and my lips trembled uncontrollably as I slid down to the floor and began to sob. I pulled up my knees to my chest and muffled my cries so that I wouldn't be heard if they turned off the music to make some sort of announcement. After what seemed like an hour, I unraveled myself and crawled towards my bed to look out the window.

My hands flew to my precious guitar that was lying securely on my bed and my fingers were instantly flying on the strings. For some reason, they knew what I wanted to play and it was a Christmas song. When I looked out the window, it was fogged up because more snow began to fall and I opened it, unleashing a flurrying of snow right at me and in my room. I pulled my gray scarf tighter around my neck and stared out to the flashy scene in front of me. Christmas decorations were still up and created a city like view, one of those clichéd Paris scenes that you would see on balconies.

The glistening snow made by the streetlights only intensified that winter feel and it made my heart somersault in quiet bliss. No family or acquaintance was here to disturb me and I would relax since there was about an hour left till the ball drops and hurray a new year comes along. I didn't find anything about a new beginning all that special, I mean sure, it meant significance to other, but for me, it was a reminded of a wasted year. This year, I was able to leave the spotlight for only a few days since I was wearing such a goofy look on my face that made my parents leap with joy, but since the party started, that happy-go-lucky memory was thrown away.

_I wish I could feel her touch again. _

My face was flushed with a high temperature that when another bite of frost rushed in, it snapped me back to reality. I shouldn't feel this way about some girl I met, she's probably going to hate me too if she got to know me. My negative train of thought crashed into me once more and I sent a heavy sigh past my lips and into the air mixed with the heater's breath and the nature's frost bite. I lifted myself up from the bed and sat down on the window's ledge with my feet resting on the roof of the garage. While sitting there, I reached for my guitar, grabbed it by frets and brought it on my lap to start playing it against the howling winds.

All my worries were washing away when the strings fused their sounds together and created a perfect sound while my fingers plucked the strings with accuracy. If I wasn't able to take my hour walk, then I should have my dose of guitar playing at least, even if I was too embarrassed to let anyone but my parents hear me. Even if I was athletic, I never pursued being a runner or some sports player because my passion was for music. Music was the thing that grabbed my heart more than my parents' admirable skills and their grasp on how they want to live their life as free as possible.

_Sometimes I feel like I'm the chain holding them back._

My hand fell from the mouth of the guitar and I lowered my head to rethink my sudden result. Why was I so wary on how my parents viewed me? Maybe it was because I view myself as a spoiled brat who can't even think of living up the expectations my parents would put out for me in an invisible bundle. It's like some sort of ladder that refuses to allow me to continue climbing it because it knows that I'll fall before I reach the top. It was a troublesome ladder, but it was always warning me that it was rickety and I shouldn't risk climbing somewhere that would be considered an alien place to me.

_I listened to the ladder._

"You stopped?" A voice down below yelled at me, breaking me from my ladder trance and I looked down to find a girl waving at me. When I saw the color of her hair and that attractive grin on her adorable face, my heart was instantly pounding against the guitar like a drum set. H-How come she's here? How is she here out of all places before New Years? Shouldn't she be with her family?

"H-H-Ha—" I couldn't even say her last name without fidgeting hysterically.

"You forgot my name already? It's Miku! Hat-sune-Mi-ku!" She pronounced with her hands cupping her wide open mouth. My guitar almost slipped from my cold fingers, but my heart was trying to break itself free from my chest. Miku began laughing almost too uncontrollably and I was downright flushed with humiliation as to how she was acting. Was I some kind of entertainment to her? I thought she'd be someone who was willing to understand me.

_I felt hurt._

"Piko-kun! Piko-kun!" Her melodious voice rang and I shot her a look of perplexity. "Aren't you going to invite me in?"

I gave an inaudible gasp at the question that was followed with a stiff nod and I found her grinning face beaming me her graceful smile that would brighten anyone's dark day.

I opened the door after walking through the halls with a skip in my step which shocked my cousins so much that they only gawked at my being striding through. I didn't care what they thought this time; I was at the peak of happiness when the image of Hatsune-san smiling at me graced its presence in my head. She was like the sole spring breeze in the death of winter hurricanes and I can't even begin to describe the effect she imprisoned me with. I feel so pathetic for sounding like I'm already drowning in this sea of emotion called love; I can't be in love with Hatsune-san, because…

I opened the door and broke my lips into a welcoming smile.

_Because… _

She returned it with her brilliantly crafted ones that made my heart soar.

_Because…_

Then I took a step aside and welcomed her in after feverishly shutting the front door closed before allowing any excess frost waltz through. I offered to take her coat, but she swatted my hand away once more with a playful wink that made my heart double over. She giggled at my abashed expression and I lowered my head to conceal it from view. I could feel everyone's gaze wander over to us, but I could care less about their surprised stares at finally seeing a different side of me. It was their own fault for blindly capturing my glass like façade in their minds instead of digging deeper to find another part of me.

_Because_…

"Piko-kun, I was kidding!" Miku chimed wondrously and I turned my back towards her in a childish manner before chuckling to myself. She has such a great hold over me that she doesn't even realize it yet. "Oh Piko-kun! Don't be mad at me! I'm sorry!" She kept insisting as she ran over in front of me and knelt down a bit to look up at my face in clear view. Pools of red whirled around in my cheeks and I took a step back, bumping into someone and creating some sort of domino effect with a few other people.

_I never knew what it was like to be in love…_

Miku cried out in panic as I grabbed my balance and turned around to find my mom on the floor trying to clean up the mess of drinks I spilled. It looked like I slammed my back into my uncle's and then he accidentally pushed his wife and she tripped and hit Dell, who pushed her away and slapped a tray of snacks and cups in the process. I frantically apologized to everyone, bowing only to have Miku burst out in laughter at my apologetic ways. Everyone looked at her, as did I, and I couldn't help but begin to laugh quietly with her ecstatic one.

Soon after, more people joined and it was a house filled with it, but it faded away as my mom finished cleaning up the mess and putting away the tray. Even though the majority of invitees stopped their laughter, Miku was still stifling hers with her blue scarf and even had tears in her pretty eyes. Being able to watch her child-like innocence display itself so perfectly was as if I was watching a play. The spotlight danced around her so wonderfully that I couldn't help but be in awe and watched her little performance come to an end.

"Quickly everyone to the family room! It's almost time!" My dad ordered as he and his brother ran out of the den room and dived into the family room. I was letting myself be pulled with the crowd, but Miku managed to grab my hand and be pulled along with me and with a smile on her face. Her eyes glistening with excitement that the big ball in the city was going to drop and that it was ending the year.

When we were all standing or sitting around in the family room, staring at the wide screen TV set up for the occasion, everyone's eyes were glued to the countdown.

_Twenty seconds left…_

Unfortunately, Miku and I were further from the TV and behind a lot of people with a few people behind us. Everyone was struggling to see what was happening on the TV with their hearts racing with thrill at the ball dropping to the bottom. I was never too excited for it, so there wasn't much affect as to where I stood in this sea of people that flocked together. However, Miku's childish presence changed that and I felt her atmosphere try to modify mine. It was like her own little spell that she wove out of thin air, even though it seemed like she didn't notice that she was the one casting it.

_Fifteen seconds left…_

"Piko-kun, make sure to make a wish!" Hatsune-san suddenly piped up and I flicked my sight down to her even though her eyes were glued to the screen.

"Why?"

_Ten…_

"Because, at this time, you want to change yourself for the better."

_Nine…_

"I'll be making a wish too, so let's hold hands and it'll probably help strengthen our resolution!"

_Eight…_

She grasped my hand into hers and she shut her eyes, probably thinking about what she was going to wish for. This brought a smile on my face and I did the same.

_Seven…_

Everyone was holding their breaths with their eyes frozen by the suspense of the New Year.

_Six…_

The children began to chant the remaining numbers and I was still thinking of what to wish for.

_Five…_

The teenagers got caught up with the chanting and smoothly dropped their voices to carrying it on.

_Four…_

The grown-ups finally caught on to the thrill and joined in, creating a mixed chorus of different ages.

_Three…_

I tightened my grasp on Miku's hand and found that she allowed me to do so. I snuck a peak at her and found myself lowering my head to her level. Her eyes were still closed and she looked as if she was sleeping while standing up.

_Two…_

I made up my mind about what wish to make and this time it wasn't about how I want to change my life. This time, it would be about what I'm going to do to make sure that my life would truly mean something to me. It wouldn't be meaningless like all those years before!

_One…_

_"I wish to be the only one by Miku's side!"_

I kissed Miku on the cheek and stayed there while everyone was cheering and before I realized that her eyes were open, it was too late. She released my hand and pressed hers against my cheek while slowing and gently removing my lips from her cheek.

_Zero! _

My heart was in total paradise, but then I saw Miku's eyes giving me a sympathetic look. I thought I did something wrong while everyone was screaming their heads off; my voice was scolding me in the back of my mind. I'm such an idiot! We're like complete strangers to each other and when I finally went on impulse, it hurt someone else and would later affect me sometime soon.

"I-I…"

Instead of letting me finish, she shut me up by kissing me on the lips with her eyes closing slowly and her hands framing my face. I let this moment flood into my system and I closed my eyes while latching hands on her waist and pulling her closer so we wouldn't separate. When we were done, everyone was already walking around, chattering and taking pictures of the first minute of the fresh year. While they were passing by each other, I had my head turned away and lowered with my hand on my lips and a scarlet face hidden from sight.

Even though I didn't want to be disturbed from such a fantastic day dream, someone pulled my sweater and I turned to find a blushing Miku flashing me a smile.

"Happy New Year, Piko-kun."

_Hatsune-san, you have no idea what affect you have on me. _

"Y-Yeah…Happy New Year…M-Miku-chan…" I returned the beam back at her, making her blush even more and slap her hands on her cheeks. She looked so cute that I began to laugh while flying my hand through my hair and she found herself laughing as well. It felt like we were the only two in this house, no, it was more like we were the only two in this entire world. A new spotlight found itself landing on us with the area around it in total darkness.

I was in a new comfort zone with my old one far away and I was happy to find that I didn't need it all my life. I really want to say thank you to Miku… for what she's done in such a short time span, but I don't think she'll know what I'm talking about, so I'll just have to smile as though there was no tomorrow. When I think about it, whenever I think of Miku, it feels like there's always going to be a tomorrow waiting for me, because I always want to be in her presence.

_Always._

"Cheers!" Everyone shouted as they toasted with one another holding a glass of cider or wine. I did the same thing with Miku and watched her drink her cider with elegance as I drank mine in a sloppy fashion. My mom corrected me, and treated me like I was a little kid needing to be trained all over again. Then she began to blab about embarrassing baby stories with Miku listening intently. I, in a flustered mess, tried to stop her from continuing, but my dad stopped me from intervening and even helped add on to whatever mom missed. My twin tailed object of affection was giggling away at these stories and was thrilled to find out that there were more to hear.

Even with my kicking and screaming, no one bothered to rescue me from my humiliating past as a child with my strange actions. Miku did send me sympathy through her beautiful eyes and I was completely lost in them so I let my mom continue on, only because I was in a trance.

"And so Piko-chan would always try to climb this tree, saying that a squirrel took his…"

"M-Mom!"

Miku sent me another sympathetic gaze that was accompanied with a stifled laugh. It sent chills down my spine, in a good way.

_Miku-chan… You struck me hard with that spell of yours… _

While everyone was going home, my parents offered to drive Miku to her house since it was so late. She declined it though, saying she lived close by and didn't want to be a bother. I offered my services of walking her back, but she rejected that too, making my heart feel heavy by that notion. Miku must've noticed this because she swiftly planted a kiss on my cheek and a wink before skipping down the steps and slowing down to a walk on the side walk. Another spell, and this time it froze me instead of the winter air doing that.

"Piko-kun!" She yelled while walking backwards and waving her arm towards me. I shook my head and took a step outside to wave my arms back at her while people were departing from my house in bundles. "Let's hope that our wishes of New Year come true!" Miku yelled and my heart felt so light that it was as though it gained feathery, angel wings. I nodded with a wide grin on my face.

"I-I'll make sure they come true!" I responded back without thinking, making her freeze then smile innocently back.

"I'll make sure you keep to your word!" Then she twirled back and walked into the darkness out of my eye sight. When everyone was gone with their cars pulling out from the sidewalks and our drive way, I released a satisfied breath and ruffled my white hair. I didn't know what came over me, but I what I did know is that I was going to make sure that both of our wishes come true. I'll do whatever it takes to do so.

"Piko, you'll catch a cold if you stay out for too long!" Dad informed, dropping me that piece of advice. I nodded and jumped back inside the house while shutting the door in a split second. "Hatsune-chan is a nice girl; make sure you're able to reel her in!" He said with a toothy grin, making the blush return to its usual place on my face.

"D-Dad!" I yelled in frustration while waving my arms around at him.

"She's pretty too!" Mom added and I grieved while they laughed at my expense.

Sorry mom and dad… but you're both wrong about Miku-chan, she's not nice, she's like the epitome of benevolence and she's not pretty, she's the definition of beautiful. While we were cleaning up, I grabbed the broom and swept at the fallen plastic cups and crumbs of food. Life was going pretty good, it felt like this was my first encounter with the aqua haired girl and it made my heart soar into a Heavenly place. Just the thought of her makes me have this rush of happiness and motivation to keep on living…

_Have I fallen for her that hard?_

* * *

In all honesty, I thought I wouldn't update so suddenly, but this is a...(fun?) fanfiction to write so I kept on going and wrote chapter two immediately after uploading the first one. I'm nervous about this having the same feel and trying to capture how a shy guy would think, act and feel about falling in love with a girl he only recently met. Also, I didn't plan for them to kiss or anything, it just appeared in the chapter like a wild Pokemon appears in tall grass. ...no idea where that reference\comparison came from, but it works! So yeah this is an early New Years' chapter for all of you!

Happy-early-New Year!

~Ventus


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